This is for the perfectionist like me.ugh!
We rate our expectation so high that we miss the point.
Perfectionist is not a quest for the best. It is the pursuit of the worst in ourselves, the part that tells us that nothing we do will ever be good enough that we should try harder -Julia Cameron, 20th/21st century writer
What drives some people crazy is not the messy house,unkempt lawn,dirty car,or even hectic schedule- often it is their own impossible expectations. People create so many rules about the way things must be done at work and at home that not only are they unhappy,but everyone else around them is too. Be aware that rhe perfectionist is difficult to live with when they are resentful,irritable, difficult to please and exhausted. Not a pretty picture,and certainly not one that portrays a happy balance. I mean,is it okay that the cookies for the meeting are store- bought instead of homemade? Is it okay that your house isn’t spotless for a week? I am not suggesting you lower your standards, just reframe them in the context of living as a man or woman in this real world. Let go of the attitude that “I’m the only one who can do it right.”
Letting go does not mean you stop caring. It means you stop trying to force others to -Mandy Hale
Today’s society places far too much emphasis on having the perfect house with nearly impossible standards for cleanliness. Unless you have the time to really focus on cleaning.Lighten Up! This is another super- high standard that will only add more unnecessary pressure,especially if you are a mother with young children.
Have you seen those television commercials that demonstrates how easy it is to have everything spotless and gleaming in the kitchen? Even when the kids drag mud all over the prinstine floor, mom is right behind applying the new magic formula,looking perfectly relaxed and smiling. Don’t you just dislike that act?
In the real world,mom is busy wiping greasy fingerprints from the front of the stove for the fourth time that day; the baby’s high chair is dripping chocolate pudding,and when the kids traipse over the not- so- clean floor wearing muddy boots,mom chases them with the mop screaming like a banshee.
No your floors do not need super gloss shine everyday,nor the window panes has to be wiped clean every morning. Get real- give yourself and everyone around you a break . Maybe your reality right now is a life of kids,dogs,and messy people. Some day,that will change. My mom used to remind me, “daughter,you don’t need to be perfect.” She is right.
Whether you have a young family or not,ask yourself, “How much fun am i to live with? Are you compromising your balance,your relationships,and your own hapiness by insisting on impossible-to- meet standards? When all is said and done,you will discover it’s your relationship that matters most. Make sure you nourish those more than anything else. When kids look back on their lives,they rarely say they are glad the floor sparkled. Instead they are happy because mom let go,and allowed them to use the couch pillows to build forts on the floor.
In the process of letting go, you will lose many things,but you will find yourself-Deepak Chopra